Saturday, February 12, 2011

Post "home alone" effects

It sucks to wake up one day and realize everything u've been holding on to was just a lie. It takes a while for it all to sink in and when it does u feel like the comfort zone under u'r feet is slipping right away away. And regret floods in and anger and sadness leavin you confused if you should,for once, be selfish and feel pity for u'r pathetic fall or for everybody else who's been hurt in the process. Then it's all a haze for the next god knows how long. And all you wanna do is just let go and scream but you can't.. Because it's the only thing u've held onto for so long no matter what.

You know that things'll neer be the same.. That nomatter how much you try "getting over" it, it'll always haunt you. Remind you of that day when you woke up and the world came tumbling down. Remind you of the fact that all that you thought was special, they never were. Reminds you that at some point it was all u'r fault. And that u'll have to live with this for the rest of u'r life..

But then like what guruji Alisha Varkey says " Sometimes love calls for withstanding much hurt".. Because in the end love is what it's all about :)

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Being the only one :/

              The thing bout growing up as mum dad's only child is i've always got what i've wanted. What more can a kid ask for besides barbies, bikes and chocolates.. Even better- i never had to share!But honestly it's one of those li'l joys of life that i miss. Not to forget those endless hours of having to sit all alone at home when mum dad're away at work.. *sigh*.. Wonder wut it'll be like to hav those petty fights over toys and clothes and who is loved more..Always been jealous of those pampered younger kids and how they take advantage of the elder ones.. Some say it's otherwise.. Like how the grass is greener on the other side.. And having an elder one or a younger is a pain cz they always put you in trouble by being the smarter one! Somebody to fight with, to hav endless talks through the night, to hit on the same guy(if i had a sis that is :P) sonuds fun! Atleast it's anyday better thn sittin all alone at home wondering what to do when mum n dad're at work :(

Guess i'll never let my children feel this way!!